Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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