tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
