I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
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