Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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