Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
3 2 1 whiskey
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
