ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
