You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
