therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
