the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
