it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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