Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Randomize
