ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
