Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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