Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
