At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
