You're a womanizer and a bitch.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize