Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
