Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
