yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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