I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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