He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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