why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
