life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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