You're my little dorito
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
