he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
