my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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