My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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