After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i already hear my dad disowning me
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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