i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
