This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
