There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
