you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
