once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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