i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
