how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
