dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
