I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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