bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
