She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
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