From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
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