i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
