is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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