I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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