so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
