i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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