help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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