I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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