Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
