More tranny stories later!
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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