Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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