Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
